now he just seems like a smelly hippie

some of the more ignorant religious zealots out there would have you believe that this is and has always been a christian nation, just because some of the things they wrote included the phrases say "Year of Our Lord," or "Almighty". anyone with an inquisitive mind and an iq above 80 is able to figure out that that's not true, and even if it was, a nation of christians is not the same thing as a christian nation. even george w bush, of all people, was audacious enough to have someone in his staff who is actually literate edit out references to religious skepticism when quoting thomas jefferson at a 4th of july speech at monticello.

nonetheless, if some of y'all still dun get it, here's a little piece of interesting history for you: the jefferson bible. also known as the life and morals of jesus of nazareth, it cuts out most of the mythological junk like the virgin birth, the resurrection, and that time he jumped right into agent smith's torso and made him explode (i haven't been to church in years, so bear with me). all that's in the book is the dude's life and what he said.

from the la times:

The big question now, said Lori Anne Ferrell, a professor of early modern history and literature at Claremont Graduate University, is this:

"Can you imagine the reaction if word got out that a president of the United States cut out Bible passages with scissors, glued them onto paper and said, 'I only believe these parts?' "

"He was a product of his age," said Ferrell, whose upcoming book, "The Bible and the People," includes a chapter on the Jefferson Bible. "Yet, he is the least likely person I'd want to pray with. He was more skeptical about religion than the other Founding Fathers."

still don't believe me, jesusfreaks? you're probably saying something like "well, where is this supposed bible?"

interwebs, bitch! or amazon, your call.

either way, i have a mental image of this secular jesus. he kinda looks like this: